I have had a lot of time on my hands lately because I can't drive or basically go anywhere. This has given me too much time to spend looking at pictures or thinking about things that we did together. I have cried and cried and cried. Christmas is difficult, I'm trying really hard to be excited about cooking dinner for all of the kids on Christmas day. I have barely started my shopping. When I start feeling sorry for myself I get even angrier with myself because there are so many people in this world with so much less that I have or with handicaps that won't be fixed in a month or so. Still I find myself feeling sorry for myself and thinking about 'what was' too often.
Then I received a Christmas card from my wonderful Aunt Joyce. She included a special little clipping just for me. It has come at the perfect time. It made me cry but it also kicked my butt a little bit and made me understand what I have to do.
You can shed tears that he is gone or
you can smile because he has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that
he'll come back, or you can open your
eyes and see all he's left. Your heart can
be empty because you can't see him or
you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow
and live yesterday, or you can be happy
for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him and only that
he's gone, or you can cherish his memory
and let it live on. You can cry and
close your mind, be emptly and turn
your back, or you can do what he'd
want; smile, open your eyes, love and
go on.
Saturday 15 December 2007
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6 comments:
ooooh! that is such a wonderful poem. i know christmas is going to be difficult, be gentle with yourself and keep it simple. go to bed and cover up your head, but don't stay there too long. keep yourself open to dreams , david will come to you in dreams.
love and kisses
auntie m
So, so beautiful. Joyce has a knack for saying or finding the words at the right time.
There's no way to make it easier, sweatheart, you just have to steel yourself and get through it. Take all the love and comfort that's offered to you to make it able to bear.
Love you lots and forever!
Forgive the spelling mistakes, please. The message is from the heart, though.
When it comes to grief just take it as it comes. But, don't let it overtake you. I know how much like Shelley you are and I know she is one of the strongest people I know. David is with you in your heart in your love and in your laughter.
Love you and I am thinking of you and praying for you during this Christmas season.
Kathy
Kim,
I know you will overcome this. It will take time. But I am sure both your sons have been rocks for you lately. I am very saddened to hear about all of the tragedy that has occurred in your life this year and wish I could say this to you face to face, but you are one of the strongest, toughest people I have ever known - you used to scare the crap out of me. You will get through this, but you have to still let yourself feel it. Don't be afraid to let yourself feel it - you're only human. And know, David is still hear with you, watching over you - I think that's why you survived your accident. Merry Christmas Kim, I hope things get better.
Oh wow. That is incredibly beautiful.
Much much much love to you sweetie!!
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